2018 was a pretty much a bipolar year for me with its extreme highs and extreme lows.
Extreme high: We moved back to the Philippines. After years of wanting to go back.
Extreme low: We lost Zack. Tried to fill the void by going to new places and buying new things. Did it help? The travels did; the shopping, not so much.
Then there are the lessons learned/re-learned along the way. . .
- Pet grief is real. Too damn real. I recorded it here in this blog, so you can see how real it is. These furbabies offer and share their lives with us, and there aren’t any wakes, eulogies and what-have-yous to celebrate their lives. I find that pretty sad.
- Losing someone isn’t always a bad thing, though it isn’t always a good thing either. It just is. There are those you think you’d lose your marbles if you lost them. Only to find out that the world didn’t end…you didn’t lose your marbles…in fact, you actually ended up alright. Then there are those you think you’d be okay living without, only to find out their absence destroyed you.
- Strangers can treat you better than those you’ve known forever. Once again, it’s just the way it is. There are people out there who can treat you and your heart with kindness. Sometimes, the ones we’ve known for so long are the ones who break and/or trample over our hearts.
- Love is blind. Sometimes you love someone so much that you don’t see them for who they are. You don’t see how you’re getting treated, how you’re settling for crumbs of their attention. Sure, just because someone doesn’t love you the way you love them, it doesn’t mean they don’t love you. But if the love is a one-way street, then it’s probably a one-way street headed nowhere. Even friendships should be mutual. Effort is required.
- Nobody is busier than someone who isn’t interested in you. I don’t just mean romantically, though it applies too. If they’ll give their time to everyone else except you, take the message for what it is. There are people out there who want to spend their time with you and who will willingly make time for you. You won’t need to wonder, beg or plead for their attention. They’ll just give it to you.
- Honesty is a very expensive gift. Don’t expect it from cheap people. Find those who appreciate your honesty and who also give it back to you.
- Listen to your gut. Especially when you get that weird feeling in the pit of your stomach. It’ll save you a lot of headache in the long run.
- Let go. Sure, letting go is scary. It hurts like hell. But sometimes it’s the only option there is. Here’s a good quote to remember about letting go.
I don’t think I’m going to like it at all. I think it’s going to hurt. But after the hurt I think maybe something good and strong and beautiful will come out of it.
There you have it. I couldn’t wait for 2018 to be done because it was just one challenge after another, there was hardly any room to breathe. But I’m looking forward to 2019 and the promise of new beginnings.